Building Confidence in 2-4 Year Olds

Why Confidence Matters
A young child that lacks confidence is nervous about trying new things and taking risks.  They are worried about experimenting with things that they do not understand. Risk-taking and exploration are important for building courage.  Risk taking and exploration help children understand that the effort of an attempt is worth more than what actually comes out of the attempt.  They learn that it is okay to fail and try again and that failure is merely a part of learning.  That is resilience and it is a skill your child will need for their whole life. 

Confidence and self-esteem allow your child to stand up for themselves or others when he / she believes something is wrong.  Confidence gives your child the strength to refuse a situation that makes him / her uncomfortable.  Having confidence helps broaden their experience and helps them develop a better understanding of how the world works.

Practical Steps for Building Confidence
These are the steps you can implement to build confidence in your 2-4 year old.

1. Be aware of over praising: When a child receives constant praise for the sake of praise, they can start looking for reward of praise in order to complete a task.  This means they will be doing the task merely for the reward of the praise rather than doing it for the love of trying.  Also, if a child knows they put in little effort and still receives great praise, they will start to question the validity of the praise. Instead parents should praise children for the effort they put in, or praise a child for attempting something, rather than the achievement itself. This will build confidence to try again the next time.

2. Allow children to take risks: Taking risks is vital for building confidence. When children are not exposed to risks or are prevented from trying things, they cannot gain the opportunity or build the confidence to learn what their limits are.  This has negative mental health repercussions.  Helicopter parents do not give a child a good grounding to be prepared for life. Children need to learn to navigate the world on their own so that they can make good choices.  This will give your child the confidence to take risks.

3. Let them make their own choices: If a child makes their own choices when they are little, they will have had a lot of practice making the right decision for themselves when they are older.  Your child will begin to know what they like and what they do not like. Making their own choices gives your child more control over their actions and this builds confidence.

4. Be careful of removing obstacles: If your child is struggling with something, it can be tempting to step in and help them solve the problem. If you feel they are capable of completing something, first let them attempt it. Ensure your child perseveres even if it is difficult.  When trying anything new for the first time, there is a period of time when your child will need to practice doing the activity.  Once they have mastered the activity on their own, they will be brimming with confidence to try something else.

At Falcon British Nursery, children are encouraged to develop independence, make choices, take healthy risks and this builds confidence every day.